HEALING THE WOUNDED CHILD & THE EGOIC SELF - 20th Sep 2014

HEALING THE WOUNDED CHILD & THE EGOIC SELF

SPIRITUAL RETREAT NZ

In a real world we would love to function as healthy adults with firm boundaries and self love
but unfortunately our parents sometimes weren't healthy and that was passed onto to us
and it forms the egoic self or the wounded child. If our parents were alcoholics then our
boundaries are less firm and co-dependence often plays out in relationships and we keep
unconsciously projecting our wounds on our partners. We go into Age Regression each
time our partner hits this wound and react like a child.

HEALING BOUNDARIES

People will often push your boundaries in life and this doesn't feel good. It is up to you
to take your power back and not allow them to treat you like this. But people often don't
know how, as the wounded child ,to take their power back.

If somebody treats you with unkindness, it's likely they have endured similar treatment in the past from others, and are only repeating unconscious patterns in search of a love they cannot find. They will continue to repeat until they wake up from their nightmare of projection, and truly see who you are, who they are, who we all are. This is when judgement comes in, but if you realise that it is not their true selves playing out but their egos, then how can you judge.

The Enneagram and Ego Patterns

Our true self is under all these layers of conditioning and this conditioning (egoic self) gets exhausting when we can't keep playing it out. It was formed in the first 6 years of life and depending on your childhood, it can be very strong as it is a form of survival in this sometimes cruel world. This can come at any time on our soul or spiritual path,but the heart is screaming to open and the soul is wanting to come home and this is when people usually come to Shunyata.

Maybe they come as they have contracted cancer and decided to know why they have it, maybe they have had a painful relationship breakup or a death that has brought a grief that can't move. Maybe the shutdown of the heart has become unbearable . Maybe they don't know what is going on but something doesn't feel right anymore.

Having observed and worked with people now for 10 years and deeply increased my awareness a of patterning – I am in awe of how quickly people can get to the core of what their soul is trying to tell them. I haven't changed the Ultimate Bliss Package once in 10 years cause it works.

Some of us need clarity of where to go next or what our life calling, purpose or gift is.

Would you love to clear these blocks?
Would you love to know your true self and not the automatic ego patterning that has been running you?
Would you like to know what goes wrong in relationships and how to change these patterns?
Would you like to open your heart and come back to your vitality & aliveness?

Read the comments of the people who have left Shunyata with a big change of heart

http://www.tripadvisor.co.nz/Hotel_Review-g255118-d3251599-Reviews-Shunyata_Health_Retreat_Day_Spa-Christchurch_Canterbury_Region_South_Island.html

Freedom in this Lifetime - THE INVITATION - 20th Aug 2014

Freedom in this Lifetime - THE INVITATION It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.
It doesn’t interest me how old you are.I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love
for your dream for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...I want to know if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain mine or your own without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy mine or your own if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you  to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful to be realistic to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day.And if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,“Yes.”
It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here.I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.I want to know if you can be alone with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Spiritual Awakening & Freedom from Mind


How is your life going? Do you feel you are truly livng or just existing? Do you feel alive
and excited about what tomorrow is going to bring or just going day by day same old same old.
Are you feeling blocked, stuck, angry, emotional or out of control? Is your health not good
and there is something taking your energy and vitality for life Have you tried everything physically and you are sick and tired of feeling sick and tired?

You are not alone. Many people are in the same boat and have no idea what is happening.
This could be physical or it could be emotional or it could be your soul calling to shift something
or deal with something that has been swept under the carpet. There are many times when life takes us to these places. The earthquakes are one of these times or it is around the age of 28-31 – they call this Saturn Return when the way of living up till then just doesn't work anymore. Another time for a woman is menopause or for a man around the same age 46-55 mid life crisis.

It could be that every relationship that you go into is bringing up the same stuff. Fear, anger,
confrontation, betrayal, hurt, shutdown. Every thing you go to do is blocked, nothing is working.
It could be financial disaster and you lose everything. It could be just the overwhelm of being
a parent and not knowing where to go from here and where to source the energy required to be
a good role model.


These things are very common at some time in people's lives but they have come up for a reason.
You can get to the core of this and free it within yourself. Most often this is related to your relationship with your parents and needs to be dealt with from the core and come to a forgiveness and completion. It could be you need to change some old beliefs that don't serve you anymore.
It could be you need to know the difference between attachment and love and fear and love in relationship. It could be conditioning or ego patterns that you are carrying from your parents that is continually causing suffering. Or it could be the images you carry of yourself that can't be kept up any more and the disturbances in your thought patterns.

There are so many things that be set right to set you free into fulfillment, transformation and freedom. Are you ready to start over? Are you ready to jump out of bed with causeless joy to
welcome the day? Are you ready to know true unconditional love in all your relationships in life.

Paru has spent 20 years in full search of this freedom and awakening and has recently returned
from India excited and ready to share these amazing techniques. She had been working with
Conditioning and ego patterns for many years and has now just topped off with many other
freedom techniques. You have to experience these in your life not just talk about them from the mind to make them change your being.

Shunyata provides this perfect sanctuary to do this in. Right on the ocean, birdsong, peace
and tranquility you wake up to. You start your day with yoga, open your heart and move the
energy through the body, eat delicious but healthy nourishing food, get great counselling, sublime pampering and body work and clear these blocks on a cellular level. It's all about you with no judgement just held by the hand and taken home to your true self. You are helped unmask the veils of illusion and lies you have been telling yourself that are blocking you in life and taken back to the authenticness of your being.

There is causeless love and causeless joy waiting for you? It has never been a better time to
jump? When your heart is open – you hear the birds better, the food tastes better, you feel
more connected and right inside. It's the end of competition, lonliness, separation and
hurt and it's the time to feel oneness in your life.


An immediate comment from last client

“I was in a situation of burn out and self doubt & could not function properly in any aspect
of my life. I knew this was a wake up call to go deeper and in finding Shunyata and spending
5 days of self discovery and detox I now have the vitality & wisdom to take on my new beginning.
Thank you life, love, Paru, Shunyata & myself.

J Taupo

Don't delay call Paru now 03 3294773 or email info@journeyessence.com


Paru just returned from University of Awakening in India brimming with joy, freedom & enthusiasm - 4th Aug 2014

Paru just returned from University of Awakening in India brimming with joy, freedom & enthusiasm

SPIRITUAL RETREAT NEW ZEALAND

DO YOU WANT TO FEEL BLISS, FREEDOM & PURE LOVE

 I feel so grateful for the most amazing month of internal discovery

I healed my candida that had been with me for over a year.  I found out the main reasons why relationships don't work.  I learnt the secrets of fulfillment and how beliefs and our relationships, especially with our parents are the major block to abundance.

I learnt how to move from fear and attachment in relationship and the importance of forgiveness.
How conditioning (ego patterns) are the image we are living from and placing on other people.
How judgement and thought disturbance keeps us in suffering.  

I am brimming with freedom, transformation and gratefulness and ready to share with
people these amazing secrets that allowed me to awaken and transform.

Go to our facebook page for daily insights

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Shunyata-Spa-and-Health-Retreat/134986226556772?ref=hl&focus_composer=true&ref_type=bookmark



Call me  now 03 3294773 and book your place for August where all of this will be 
free of charge in your retreat

The Flowering of the Heart- Moving from Emotions to Feelings - 14th Jul 2014

I am at present in a university for the inner journey and to become awakened to be part of the
2 million people awakened in this world at present from this Oneness University.

It is amazing after 20 years of the journey in how much I have truly learnt, experienced and feel incredibly aware of and grateful for in the 2 weeks so far of this journey.  I made a declaration to be here for me and to do my journey but I can't help to feel how passionate and excited to share this with my clients.  We talk about transformation and freedom and see what is stopping us from experiencing this freedom.  I had felt freedom, there is no doubt about it as my ego patterns (they call conditioning) doesn't run my life right now, but this is a different type of freedom.  How our minds are just one mind and not to get rid of it but become friends with it.  We can't just get this from our minds we have to experience it for ourself and then it sinks into our beings our cells.  

I feel judgement is leaving me, I'm feeling more and more one with the animals, the plants, all
different nationalites.  You still have good days and bad days, but you are not attached.  You
know - this too will pass.  Little things that used to annoy me, have gone.  I care but I'm not attached.  My cranio-sacral sessions that we have been sharing, are deeper and more powerful than they have ever been and I feel a vehicle to truly help this world to heal.  I am so excited writing to you I can't contain this incredible passion and joy and love.  

I have learnt the difference between feelings and emotions and the difference between consciousness and awareness.  I have learnt the difference between love and attachment.
How to be with the mind and to make it your friend.  I have learnt how to bring abundance in your life and how your relationships with your parents either cause blocks in life or lack of abundance.

We come with so many blocks that hold us back from flowering.  Our belief systems, not
truly forgiving our hurts and our when our relationships are not good, we are not good.
We find that what we call love is attachement and it causes so much suffering in us.
Our fears disturb the peace in our hearts.  How we hold judgement of people and this robs
us of our freedom. Most people are dead, they are not living from their hearts.  Their life is run by conditioning, beliefs, fears and judgements.  How can we truly live?

They say we are beacons to help this planet heal by people waking up.  It comes a time in your life where you too have to share this light.  Today we did a  sunrise meditation and I truly felt the sun healing my cells, removing my toxins and can imagine doing  this on the deck at Shunyata.

I feel so grateful to have you in my life, so grateful for life, for my gorgeous place and for this
moment of bliss.  Love to you all from my deepest awakened heart.

If you want to experience some of this gorgeous amazing energy - bookings are available from August 7 onwards and I would love to see you again or anyone you know who could do with
a beautiful new start in life.

email info@journeyessence.com

The Highest form of Love - Self Love - Unconditional Love & the Way Home - 10th Jun 2014

The Highest form of Love - Self Love - Unconditional Love & the Way Home
HOW DO WE TRULY LOVE OURSELVES

Today belongs to love, let me not fear.”

Nearly every person who comes to Shunyata doesn't really love themselves.They have disconnected from their true selves and are not loving the ego they are living under.What is this – weren't we told that” to be there for ourselves was selfish.”
Who are we really? Have you ever asked yourself who are you? What am I here for? What is my purpose? Most of us are just winging life.

When did it happen – when did we “edge god out” ego. It happens at about 3 yrs old where we took on a mask, a false identity and we realise that we have to set about doing something to get love. We start to realise we are what we achieve, what I have or what I do or what people think of us and then the pattern of ego gets formed. It was a place of survival of the strongest.

The world out there is going through deep stress. Stress is how we respond to the world when our needs are not met. Anger is a reaction to not getting our needs met and a loss of control. All of these reactions are based on our false identity.  It has come to a time where this competitive destructive ego and separation is not sustainable any more and the planet is hurting. Co-operation and mutual aid is the only way to go.

“I am the hole in the flute for which life flows” Rumi

There is our higher self, our essence our pure self and our mind or egoic self which is best described in the enneagram work.The Enneagram is a detailed map of the ego. It describes who you THINK  you are. It shows clearly patterns of the movements of mind. How the mind grasps what it wants, move away from what it fears, and push against what it wants to change or control.
The enneagram can be a truly masterful tool for waking up out of egoic identification. By seeing our own patterns, we can stop them when they don’t serve what we really want. We can notice how fear, anger, and sadness are mechanical emotional patterns that are common to all egos, and we can stop taking them personally. We can wake up out of the stories we form from these emotions, and realise they are not even real. In fact, most of what we are thinking, feeling and experiencing is just mechanical patterns of survival, being filtered through the egoic mind.  How can we truly love this egoic self?
 The search for enlightenment, is really the search for the truth of who we are. Suffering comes from ignorance, as the Buddha said thousands of years ago. Ignorance means ignoring reality, and placing our attention on what is not real. Instead of being present to the living, immediate, undiluted truth, we subjugate ourselves to a dead, conceptual reality based on the past. Our conditioning, what we have learned from others who themselves are ignorant of the truth, as well as our emotional reactions and our physical sensations, becomes reality for us. We believe it, act it out, and find proof and agreement for our stories of who we are.

 Some of us at the core of the egoic mind feel a deep sense of worthlessness, unworthiness, and self loathing. So we cover this deep self hatred with trying to get love from the outside.

Others of us feel in the depth that we are weak and incompetent, this gets covered with armour
saying I am strong and confident.

Some of us are deeply enraged. We feel a loss of control But feeling anger is not appropriate socially, and is not loveable, so instead we push it down, cover it over, go to sleep, go numb on top of it, so as not to explode and hurt someone, or break something. So we appear mellow and calm on the outside.

And some of us are simply terrified. A deep sense of terror lurks inside, about survival, death, abandonment, betrayal, not knowing, or being stuck. We then project loyalty, and fearlessness, in order to protect ourselves from our own mental projections of fear.
 
There is hope, there is a higher self inside each of us. This is the beauty of innocence,this is what we came in as. Our essence is divine, it's peaceful, it's real and authentic. We can go on a spiritual search for this but it is inside and it's pure. Also on this planet at the moment there is help to live from this place. 2 million people recently have become awakened and it's available to all of us.. We touch this place inside of us here in Shunyata, your essence your source and then it's about living from that place. 

Spirituality is about being honest with yourself and saying goodbye to this identity that
you thought was you. Spiritual awakening often happens after someone experiences a major trauma or turmoil in their life.

When you wake up at 3am in the morning know that this time is special

“The morning breeze has secrets to tell you do not go back to sleep “Rumi

This is the time you are closest to your true self to your essence.From this place you experience unconditional love.

A great movie about the ego is called "The Shift" Wayne Dyer






Be Part of the Magic Happening at Shunyata - 18th May 2014

Be Part of the Magic Happening at Shunyata

AWAKENING IS POSSIBLE FOR ALL OF US RIGHT NOW


Hello beloveds

Do you want magic to happen in your life. We are programmed to grow spiritually in this lifetime and if we are not growing we feel stagnant.

Wow who would have thought we could become awake in this lifetime. Maybe you have never considered this for yourself. I didn't want it enough until Santosh and I split up and then I knew
freedom from mind, from ego, from conditioning and karma was all I wanted and what better time
to attain it than in this planet at this time.
http://www.onenessnewzealand.co.nz/
I have recently become part of the oneness group which I have been observing for quite a few years but as we always believe in timing – wasn't the right time. I was meant to do one of the first courses in India way back in 2004 after my yoga teachers training and didn't go. Saw them in Bali and loved the no ego part of their persona, watched old friends in Byron Bay completely change and it wasn't until recently after I heard about the chambers they hold, that a friend took me. Amazing things have been happening in little old Diamond Harbour. They have started cutting down myhedge and now the trees in front that have blocked the view (as you all know this has been here for 3 yrs. Wow what a view – we are now so close to the ocean. .After doing the weekend oneness blessing I cleared all with my father and money issues are fading. My excitement for life is contagious and I can't stop smiling. 2Million people on this planet have been awakened which means that their minds and patterning are no longer running them.

Oneness is helping you connect to your higher power - to your divine and ask for help to clear all the things you have been doing on your own.  Your karma, your patterning and your ancestral conditioning.  It accelerates all that we were doing on our own.  It's magic and it's real.  Anything that takes you away from feeling one with the universe.

What this means for you my beloved clients is, if you are keen on this, you can have free oneness blessings at Shunyata and have a taste of this amazing awakening. I am off to India in July into
August to deepen this process and so ask you to tell all your friends who have thought about coming to Shunyata that June is the month. It is the time for Vata's to do a detox as many people
are feeling out of balance. It is also the time to deepen into your source, your essence and
have more peace in your life. We look at hurts, when we haven't forgiven totally, fears and where we lie to ourself and where we are not in acceptance of things. $50 off journey retreats and $100 off detox's. Did you know that addiction is anything we use to escape the present moment. We can be addicted to our minds,food and anything.

You can ask for whatever you want because you deserve – it is granted if you are authentic. I
want to share this with you – I want you to taste this amazing freedom. Call now 03 3294773
or email info@journeyessence.com.

So spread the word to your friends and if you can make it in June for a tune up let me know.
Shunyata will be closed July till mid August and maybe end of August and then who knows,
but magic is possible for all of us. Move beyond mediocrity and start becoming part of this
amazing awakening on this planet. You can't put a $ value on this freedom.

Confused About Love - Sick of doing the Same Thing Over & Over - 9th Apr 2014

Confused About Love - Sick of doing the Same Thing Over & Over

A Higher Love - What is it really?

Many of us are longing for that soul mate, that person to grow with and yet what are we doing to sabotage it. Maybe you're already in a relationship and it's not fulfilling you and you feel alone. Wherever you are at hopefully these points will help you get clearer.

First of all what is an enlightened healthy relationship. For me it has a higher purpose in mutual awakening and participation in conscious evolution. Lifting the relationship to a higher ground and it's not always comfortable and beyond romantic infatuation. But your joint purpose is to serve humanity from your higher self and you have a mirror to help you in this and take you back to this when you go off into ego patterns etc.

For many of us women who are longing to live this relationship we need to take responsibility for why we are not attracting it. We can complain that our partner is not spiritual enough, this can be a sort of spiritual arrogance, go and live what you want to follow and let him live what he wants to follow. Maybe you have evolved and left him behind and then you need to truly ask yourself what is more important for you. But for us that is calling this into our lives – here is some tips on how we can be ready in ourselves.

Don't kid yourselves ladies – all our integrity goes out the door when we romantically fall in love.
So make it your prayer to rise in love. Get your closest trustable friends to tell you the truth if this relationship is serving you after 6 months and listen. Get really clear on what you want in a relationship and share it at the beginning – and if you are not on the same paths, or if you let illusion not let you hear that he isn't, then you will be creating more suffering for yourself again.

1. Get real about all the core beliefs, the sabotages and the blocks that have happened in past relationships and come and clear out ego patterns that are not serving you. Most of them are rooted in childhood and we keep repeating them, until we say enough. These are things like unworthiness, control, self righteousness, pride, fixing the other, putting the other on a pedestal and balancing the ability to be able to receive and not give. Get radically authentic with yourself and commit to authenticity. Clear back what is not serving you and just be yourself. You know that a partner is good for you if you are just being yourself. http://www.journeyessence.com/pages/13-2/Shunyata-Retreat-and-Day-Spa-for-emotional-healing-mind-and-body

2. For a woman to stay in her power she needs to connect to her higher power, her divine so when men,who are so clear, speak – she can say her truth and not always stay quiet. “All of life is organising around my success and it's safe for me to say what I feel and think.”

3. Most of us women are very strong and independent and are not open to ask for help and also to receive support. This is very unattractive to the masculine. We come into relationship to carry each other's burdens. We need to surrender to love – not to the man. Is he on the train you want to jump on.

For the people in relationship some practices for them both if their intention is a higher mission for conscious evolution.
1.Get clear on why you are together. Are we comitted to live from our evolved edges? How can we use each other to grow and awaken?

2.We agree to be a mirror for each other. To praise each other and to serve each others higher self. I love you and I see this potential in you. This is done through unconditional love and challenge but in the most kind and caring way rather than judgement and criticism. We don't often see our own blocks. To show where our behaviour is not consistent with our higher values.

3. We then live in this authenticity and model for other people. When a pattern shows up in the other that causes a reaction in us,to really ask if we are living it in ourselves. How can we be a catalyst for change in the world. The old quote – “be the change you want to see in the world.” We all know ourselves how inspired we become when people are living what they are teaching. I say this as much as possible, we are still human and not to go to self righteousness.

 Paru has recently returned from the ISTA Consciousness and Sexuality Conference and nearly every workshop was centred  around  the relationship we have with ourselves.  We look for the other to fill our holes and we are the only one who can really do this.

My deepest prayer in this lifetime is that I live from this authentic place and help others to evolve their own relationships in this integral, authentic way.

Conscious Uncoupling NZ - What is involved and how can you get help to do it? - 8th Apr 2014

Conscious Uncoupling NZ - What is involved and how can you get help to do it?

 How to Uncouple Consciously and the benefits for you and the kids

If you didn't hear about this new phenomenon when Gwyneth Paltrow announced this was how
she wanted to end her marriage - then this is the new discussion in the relationship world.
Many people don't like this phrase and don't have any idea what it means.

What does it really mean?  A breakup that entails goodwill, generosity & respect.  Both people are valued for what they shared together and there is minimal damage to themselves and their children.

You might ask yourself - how do we do this in such a traumatic time.  Well a bad breakup is the
most traumatic thing people can go through. If you don't tend to a broken heart then it can be as bad as death in the brain chemistry.  People sense it as a form of failure  Dr Helen Fisher, a leading expert in the field of love and attraction, says that getting dumped is worse than coming off a cocaine addiction www.match.com/magazine/article/12126/How-To-Mend-Your-Broken-Heart/ 
Nature is not designed for us to separate quickly.  When attachment is broken it can cause depression and apathy.  This all needs to be done consciously.

Statistics have shown that the divorce rate is not slowing down and most people going through divorce are over 50.  Why is it so high, well values have changed, the old assumed goal of love being- stay together for ever ,isn't so prevalent.  Life has sped up and communication between couples has broken down.  People want more so both couples are working and the women are losing their femininity and the men are feeling emasculated.

Paru, the owner and operator of Shunyata - a health and healing retreat working with couples for 10 years,  has had her own experience by going  through a nasty break up over 20 years ago in Byron Bay Australia.  She can now look back now  and know  that  the scared, contracted heart and the pain & suffering she endured over 10 years, was  the catalyst for a spiritual awakening.  She truly believes that when we marry we make a vow and that vow has a life force of its own and stops all other possibilities.  So when we break up that vow is still in place and it needs to be replaced with a healthy vow to enable the couple to uncouple in a less painful way.  She has kept many people out of the family law court with ego patterns - fear and flight, trauma taking over healthy decisions for the children.
What about if you are on the cusp - don't know whether to go or to stay?  You must ask yourself: .
1.Are you prepared to lower your standard of living ?
2. Are you willing to work towards a healthy & wholesome transformation of relationship for      the children, like brother & sister?
3. Are you willing to not put the other partner down in front of the children?

This is asking a lot if all you are in is survival ego patterns and it takes a lot to come away from that. You must do this breakup before it gets abusive towards each other and take the children into account and how they are feeling everything that is going on.

Key practices – 5 steps
1. Get a handle on your emotions.  Get out of fight & flight. Take no action when in total emotion. have a friend on standby to vent.
2. Do not wait for time to heal your broken heart.  Reach out and ask for help to heal this heart  Otherwise you will have a  closed and mistrusting heart which uses your life force.
3. Make something beautiful of this, make choice to grow up and not grow old, like a  spiritual awakening  - can be such a positive change.
4. Don't get stuck in blame story going over and over this adds to shame.  Turn attention to new beginning and your expanded family.  Ask for what you need.
5.  Align your community of family and friends so that no one need to carry this shame.  Your            husband can see his mother in law etc.  Do not lose connection with family.

So it's doing this break up like an adult and often this is hard because we have never been taught.
Many of us have had dysfunctional childhoods and fear of survival comes up and this is the time
to do the work and clear out these patterns for your children and your next relationships.
This is one time when you truly need to reach out and ask for help, I wish I had this help 20 years ago and the reason I opened Shunyata Retreat

The benefits for your future are numerous.
1.  Your ongoing relationship with your ex partner and the children will be so much better and the children will not be damaged.
2. You will be able to function in the world with an open heart, not shut down and suffering.
3. You will prepare yourself for a higher more fruitful next relationship
4. You will learn to love yourself and know who your truly are beyond ego patterns.
So call Paru now 03 3294773 or email info@journeyessence.com

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